Winter-proof your mood and energy
It's ok not to love this time of year
“I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” I moaned to a friend last week. “I’m so tired. I feel unenthusiastic and unmotivated. And I’m so quick to anger; snapping at the kids, then being upset with myself about it. Everything feels so hard. It’s just not like me.”
She sipped her coffee thoughtfully, then replied: “I know this sounds really basic, but could it be the weather?”
I definitely knew that the weather wasn’t helping. But it wasn’t until she put it so simply that I realised quite what a massive impact it has on my mood, energy and motivation.
At this time of year, I often see people on social media delighting in the change of seasons. They’re happy to pack away their summer dresses, batten down the hatches and get cosy.
Or they’re embracing the Winter Arc by setting work/fitness/personal development goals to hit by Christmas (I can’t even with this trend).
But then there are people like me, standing despondently in front of the newly-erected Christmas display in the supermarket, feeling the damp from the rain seeping through an inappropriate-for-autumn coat, and sadly thinking: “But… I thought there was still a chance of an Indian summer?”
Unlike other depressing things, there is this sense that we should be out here just loving autumn. Those autumn-obsessed people will bleat on about how they actually love wearing tights, but all their efforts really do is make us feel worse about wishing it was still summer.
Since tomorrow is World Mental Health Day, I thought I’d share my toolkit of things that help me feel better. None of them are rocket science, but it’s good to have a reminder that:
This seemingly inescapable low mood could just be the weather.
There are things that you can do about it.
Here’s what works for me…
Getting outside. In the summer, I like to go for a run or walk early, before the kids are up. In the winter, it's too dark and scary, so I have to go at lunchtime. Often this doesn’t happen, because it feels like such a luxury and waste of vital work time. But I've realised that, if I don't do it, then all of the world’s misery hits me at 4pm.
Gratitude. I know, blah blah blazzzzzz. “Write a gratitude list” has become the most annoyingly hackneyed piece of mental health advice ever. But it works. I’ve been using the Journal app to write down one good thing each day, which trains my brain to notice not only the big things, but also the glimmers.
Getting hot. Relaxing in a sauna, getting sweaty in a hot yoga class, or even just having a hot bath does for me what cold water immersion appears to do for other people. It boosts my mood and energy, and makes me a much nicer person to be around. I’ve just started paying for a gym membership, mostly for the sauna.
Not drinking. I’m fully aware that many people can’t imagine winter without big glasses of red wine but, for me, it’s not worth the headaches, hangxiety, bad sleep and constant gnawing fear of getting breast cancer again. Sorry to be a buzzkill, but this list is what works for me, not What You Must Do. If you are trying to cut back however, I recommend identifying a favourite alcohol-free drink. Currently, mine is Botivo with soda and an orange wedge.
Get more light. Last year, I bought one of those daylight alarm clocks, which gradually brightens up your room as if the sun is rising by your bed. I love it (although my husband has vetoed it on weekends).
On those days when the sun does manage to break through the gloom, don’t automatically reach for your sunglasses. I’m guilty of this, since mine are prescription so help me see where I’m going, as well as making me look cool. But your brain needs that morning light to regulate your melatonin levels and help you sleep better later.
Festivities. Despite everything, I actually love Christmas. Not necessarily Christmas Day itself, but all the stuff around it: twinkling lights, the smell of mulled wine (I don’t drink it any more, but do love the smell), decorating the tree, watching Elf, wearing a stupid jumper, seeing the kids lose their minds over advent calendars and stockings… October is too soon but, as soon as bonfire night is over, I’m all about Christmas.
Eating well. I have banged on before about the power of food for improving your mood, which does not mean eating a depressing salad with the heating on. We’re getting into baked potato season, and they’re brimming with vitamin C. Or try protein-packed lentil dhal, or antioxidant-rich beetroot pasta… comfort food can be as nourishing for your mind as it is for your body.
Learning to (could I? maybe?) love it. Yes, I find it extremely hard to embrace the cold. All the more reason to dig out my copy of Wintering by Katherine May (who also writes a great Substack) as a reminder that we need the ebb and flow of the seasons. I will try to stop resisting the joy of a cosy jumper or a shiny conker in the vain hope that it will bring back the sunshine, and make the most of what this season brings.
My seven-year-old summed it up on the school run this morning. “This weather,” she sighed, peering up at the dark grey sky, “is moody.”
And she’s right, but it doesn’t mean that I have to be.
This week I’m…
Celebrating Menopause Awareness Month with Boots & Macmillan, whose new campaign supports the women in early menopause after cancer treatment.
Sending love to anyone affected by Baby Loss Awareness Week.
Getting tips from The School of Life’s latest book, The Secrets of Successful Relationships, which includes lessons on being vulnerable, not being defensive and “confidence in one’s weirdness”.
Accept and embrace are two words that help me navigate seasonal shifts. I like to look for the beautiful nuances nature brings, be it roses in Spring or the quiet pause of a crisp Autumn morning before the clouds break (be it sun or rain!)
I find making a few changes in my home helps too, and it tends to start with a bit of a spring clean, whatever the season. A new woollen blanket has already found its way to my bed and I love having my windows open through the day to let in the fresh air while I work, then hunkering down into my new cosy layer in the evening
Completely speaks to me. It’s grey, cold and the days are short… and yet I’m meant to embrace it.. Could everyone stop with this nonsense.
But your tips are all good ones.